Miriam Grace Climenhaga

Owed To Mr. Coleman (or the importance of walking...)

2011-12-15T17:08:00.000-06:00

It is in these little
moments…

The cloud shaped
like a horse running away.

The gray sleet settling
soft
into memory.

Lost clementines against straw grass.

Fall is Winter is Spring is Summer is
Fall into
the big things…
Life is
alive
with you in it.

Microcosm…

that you are…

~Miriam Climenhaga 12/14/2011

pssst.

2011-02-13T15:54:00.002-06:00

Consider this a line break.

You know I like to yammer about what to do where with what on the internet regarding my art.

Yeah, I know that was a run on sentence.

So I like to tweet. (see sidebar.)

I like to share art.
http://miriamgraceclimenhaga.posterous.com/

in a couple of ways...
flickr

Sometimes I like to talk which will now be found:
http://miriamclimenhaga.wordpress.com/

And I am going to start locating stuff that might be for sale here... at least that's the plan. I'm sure I could streamline it all, but I never really like the way that looks. Plus which I have fun jumping around and being crazy.

xxoo
Miriam

9. A man who wastes one hour...

2011-01-28T19:32:00.001-06:00

9. A man who wastes one hour...
Originally uploaded by miriam.climenhaga

peace

2011-01-17T21:17:00.004-06:00

2010-11-01T20:17:00.002-05:00

I am playing around with using wordpress for a blog lately... and this last post took me a loooong time to get posted, so as I do not have the energy to redo it here at this moment in time...I present it as a link for you.

http://miriamclimenhaga.wordpress.com/2010/11/02/dia-de-los-muertos/

2010-08-18T10:30:00.002-05:00

This blog is going on a long vacation. I'm not really sure how long, or if I will come back. I feel that thing in my bones that makes me go and start yet anther blog, trying to figure out and attain that goal which has no name. I do know this: We are moving in a few days and I won't have an internet connection for awhile. I need to do more art and less internet. I have a gazillion thoughts in my head and I need to try and ground a couple and turn them over and really analyze them. Let's just pretend this has all been a prequel. Not that there has been much to see. I also know, for a fact, that I want any blog I have to basically be a journal about my journey as an artist. But, I am currently a mom to a six year old boy who is extremely active. I don't want this to be a mom blog. So I'm going to go crawl away and hibernate for a bit. See you on the other side.

Memory #1

2010-08-04T22:26:00.003-05:00

Memory #1
12"x16"
acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas
$185.00 (plus shipping)

If interested in purchasing, please email me at climenhaga@gmail.com

The Wishing Tree

2010-08-04T16:51:00.004-05:00

The Wishing Tree
12"x16"
acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas
$300.00 (plus shipping)

If interested in purchasing please email me at climenhaga@gmail.com

When all else fails...quote Shakespeare!

2010-07-23T15:03:00.003-05:00

pssst...click on the picture...

Boxes!

2010-07-21T19:59:00.006-05:00

I have recently listed these boxes and containers that I had painted awhile back in my 1000markets shop. While I love 1000markets because they have great style, I am always somewhat uncomfortable with them because you must pay through Amazon Payments. There's nothing wrong w/ Amazon Payments, but maybe you want to pay with a check? Or Paypal? Never fear...that's why I'm showing you these in my blog as well! If you're interested...just shoot me an email, or leave me a comment. ;)

Please take a look at these at my 1000markets shop! There's many more pictures there! :)

Take me to the boxes!

2010-07-04T13:52:00.007-05:00

I had a few prints made up before the local print shop that I used closed it's doors for good. If you are interested in any of them, please feel free to shoot me an email at climenhaga@gmail.com.

"Childhood was Waiting"
image is 7"x9" on an 8"x10" paper
2 available at 20.00 each
plus shipping

"Vine"
image is 5"x7" on an 8"x10" paper
2 available at 20.00 each
plus shipping

"The Tree of Life"
7.8"x9.8" on an 8"x10" paper
2 available at 20.00 each
plus shipping

"Minerva on a Mountain"
8 3/4"x12" on an 11"x14" paper
1 available at 30.00
plus shipping

All of these prints are made on Epson Premiere Enhanced Matte paper using Epson Ultrachrome 9800 K3 inks. The archival guarantee is 85 to 100 years.

If you would prefer, you can purchase any of these via my etsy shop with paypal.

Returning to old themes....

2010-05-27T15:25:00.005-05:00

I have a problem. I never want to throw anything away. Like this pillowcase that keeps popping up in my work. Or these two girls since I made a pattern of them...and have several cut outs of them. So certain things just continue to pop up, but never in a row for some reason.

I'll keep you posted, as it is sure to change...

Pilgrimage (or "happy at last...")

2010-04-30T19:20:00.003-05:00

"Pilgrimage"
14"x14"
mixed media

Really, I'm done! ;)
Happy at last.
Review: First

Secondly

Pilgrimage

2010-04-28T09:58:00.002-05:00

I have come to the conclusion, in recent days, that the painting I posted in my last post is...in fact...not done. I think I have been in too much of a hurry of late to "get things done", and a consequence of that has been thinking somehow I can make paintings be done or "magically appear" somehow. This painting is particularly puzzling to me, because in some ways I just don't really like it. But that is what seems to keep me driven on it. I just don't want to let it go until there is something more about it that I like. In looking for that, I have been slowed to a snail's pace. But that is okay. I recollect being 28 and living "alone" (I had roommates) and being "allowed" to have the luxury of hanging paintings on the wall and simply staring at them for as long as I wanted, until the direction they should be taken, unfolded. I would lie on my mattress and just look as I drifted off to sleep....
I should allow myself that contemplation more often.

In progress...

2010-03-16T16:28:00.003-05:00

Some of you may remember this painting. (click on that link...) I didn't care too much for it, so I decided to change it up a bit. This is what I have come up with...

A little tweaking is in order. There are things that need "sharpening" but they are only things that I probably notice. I wonder if all artist's are perfectionist's that way...I assume they are. It's a lot like when you are in a play. The actor knows where they messed up, but the audience doesn't unless the actor tells.

The Wishing Tree

2010-03-11T15:30:00.000-06:00

acrylic...gallery wrapped canvas...12"x16"

...thislittlepiggystayedhome...

2010-03-02T07:56:00.004-06:00

I wake up in the "middle" of the night with these perfect thoughts about things to write about. As if I am a writer by trade. But I am not. I sometimes think I am nothing by trade. And that thought is what encompasses my day when I wake up. I had the thought of a great novel I could write the other night...wisps of poetry weave through my dreams occasionally...and when I'm really lucky I see a painting fully formed. Paintings are the only thing I seem to be able to actually do anymore. And even those...
These are hard times. I have grown weary of hearing about the economy much the same way it became tiresome when I lived in the mountains to hear "it's the altitude", or when I lived in the desert how it was all blamed on the "dry heat". While we have more than some, and much less than others, the worry of thinking about how we are going to get through the next month with the house in Keats on our back still, or the debt that has piled up that we chip away at with a tiny little nut cracker pick every month, gets to me. I spend so much of my time trying to find jobs right now that it seemingly drains all of my creative energy. I find temporary or part time jobs that never seem to be what they advertised exactly. Even if I could find some sort of really good, full time job, I am not clear what we would do with H. when he wasn't in school. R's job is of the nature that he needs to be somewhat "on call" all of the time, so it's not just as easy as I work at night and on the weekend's... or during the day but only until three. I suppose there are after school type programs we could pay for. But we certainly couldn't pay for them until we I actually had a job that made enough to cover it. And so I look...but since I haven't been "working" for six years, I am not qualified for any job, apparently. Maybe I should start saying I worked at a daycare for the past six years. I am recording this here so I will remember. I will either look back over time and think that I had it much easier back then, or will think that I had it much harder. Hopefully it is the latter.
I have never been one much for painting dark and moody paintings. Color always rears it's head and tries desperately to lighten my mood. Some paintings may come out "dark" but it is never my intention. I have a hard time taking all this anger I feel at our current situation and parlaying it into a painting. Thus, I don't paint much when my thoughts are predominantly like they have been. But I need to. I have to turn over something here in later March to my friend who has an art gallery in Colorado where they will be hanging for three months. I have been in knots thinking about how I don't have a "series", how they all seem so "different", how they are all such varied sizes...the list goes on and on. How I won't have "enough".... and all those thoughts make me dwell on my "lack of training"... But I persevere anyway, because I have to. There are worse things that I would "have" to do. Incidentally, I have very similar thoughts about writing things in this blog. Like right now. "But it isn't really about art...", or "I am complaining too much" or "It's all disjointed"....
Which brings me to a point. Or "my" point... or "the thought I need to keep in mind"...
I started painting out of joy. It was a break from what I had spent my life learning and absorbing, which was the Theatre. I got a degree in Theatre because I was so close to it by the time I had a very strong realization that I wanted to pursue fine art. I remember at the time I very purposefully did not want to go to school. I did not want the bureaucracy of academics to take away my fire for painting the same way it had taken away my love for the Theatre. But, even without the academic training, the more you create, the more you sell, the more you think about it, you can't help but have these little thoughts creep into your mind trying to criticize your vision and say it has to be a certain way that you had nothing to do with creating. That is what I want to put a stop to.
I woke up in the middle of the night the other night and had the thought that everything I am regarding painting is about memory. The very nature of painting has to be about memory. Even if it's a plein aire painting outside in the moment of conception, there is still an element of memory to it. However, my painting's are more about memory in a rather obtuse sort of way. Perhaps I need to figure out how to connect that in words so the viewer can experience that "series" sort of feel that everyone is always talking about. But I see that connection in each piece that I create. I am not able to paint the same thing over and over again. I suppose I should try, but I wonder why every time I think that. Ultimately, for me, all my paintings could probably be summed up with the underlying thought that they are all just about "grasping at straws". Think about that. The theme is "grasping at straws"....
Which is what I am doing right now I suppose. I had no set agenda for what I was going to write when I sat down. I approached it the same way I used to write poetry when I was a kid. I put the blank sheet of paper in front of me, and stared.
I do know that I have realized that I will not keep this blog updated if I make it only about posting art, because the truth is there can be great lulls in making art. And the truth is I need to "talk" about it. Even if it's just grasping at straws in order to figure it all out.

Warmth

2010-02-01T10:19:00.003-06:00

Warmth
6"x6"
gallery wrapped canvas
mixed media
available in my shop

Try some new things...

2010-01-27T22:08:00.002-06:00

Trying something new in using some different things to draw on. Hoping to loosen up the limbs about mixed media and such. The first is a page ripped from a very old book about WWI that is falling apart and I'm not sure where I even got it. Now that I write this, I honestly think I have to go see if it's about WWI or WWII. Anyway... I pasted it to another piece of watercolor type paper that I inherited from my dad, and that paper is also ancient, but not falling apart. Rather, it has held up quite well. There's just something about old things that I find inspiring. I've seen a few artists do this type of drawing over text and wanted to try it out. Though always about the images, I found I wasn't so interested in the text as I was the photo. You might click on the drawing to get a better look at the men's faces. Fascinating. The second is the front of a Christmas card I got this year that I thought was rather pretty. It's shinier in person. Funny how the scan makes the embossed image stand out more.

Memory # One

2010-01-26T08:51:00.002-06:00

12"x16"
acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas

Muse

2010-01-21T20:08:00.004-06:00

16"x24"

acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas
$400.00
shipping not included

to purchase please email climenhaga@gmail.com
also available as a print in my shop.

Nothing to be done...

2010-01-21T13:30:00.003-06:00

30"x40"
Acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas
$800.00 (shipping not included)

to purchase please email climenhaga@gmail.com

Lost

2010-01-17T20:18:00.005-06:00

24"x24"

Mixed Media on gallery wrapped canvas

(please click on a photo to get a better view...)
$350.00 (shipping not included)

to purchase please email climenhaga@gmail.com

Her Head Never Left...

2010-01-14T18:38:00.004-06:00

Framed 15.5" x 18"
ink w/ a dash of acrylic on bristol paper

$200.00

(shipping not included)

to purchase please email climenhaga@gmail.com

Better Never To Have Met You In My Dream...

2010-01-13T14:39:00.004-06:00

"Better never to have met you in my dream than to wake and reach for hands that are not there." ~ Otomo No Yakamochi

30" x 40"

acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas

$800.00

(shipping not included)

to purchase please email me at climenhaga@gmail.com

Still working on this drawing....

2010-01-12T13:15:00.000-06:00

Still working on this drawing. It kind of feels like a coloring page at this point and I'm not sure what I think of it, but it does give me something to do while watching mindless tv...

You're something beautiful...

2010-01-10T13:14:00.005-06:00

12"x12"
gallery wrapped canvas
$200.00 (shipping included in U.S.)

to purchase please email me at climenhaga@gmail.com

Draw365

2010-01-10T11:33:00.009-06:00

I seem to have left off posting here at drawing #8. I started posting them all in flickr instead for some reason. But since I want to try and keep this blog current, and I want to try and keep drawing every day (which I am currently failing at miserably), I will post them here again. So this post is to catch you, dear reader, up on those drawings/failings/masterpieces and allow me to start again....

#9

#10

#11

#12

#13

#14

#15

#16

#17

#18

#19

#20

#21

#22

#23

#24

#25

#26

#27

I've got to get busy again because that last grouping of little tiny sketches is pretty sad...

And the winner IS.....

2010-01-09T20:04:00.004-06:00

We have a winner! Thank you to everyone who left a comment and entered my drawing. Some of you reminded me that people really do look at this blog every now and then! :) And without further delay....

First I wrote up all the names that entered.

Then I double folded them and put them in a hat so that H. couldn't read the name. He saw me fold up the last half of names and saw the name "Susan" and declared he wanted her to win. ( I guess he likes that name...) But I told him he had to draw a name without looking...

H. poses w/ the folded names before the big moment.

He said to me here "But how do I know which one is Susan's?" I told him again he had to pick fair and just pick a name without looking.

He got sooooo excited when he saw the name he picked that he kept jumping up and down and wouldn't hold still. (Sorry Susan, it isn't you...but maybe I should send you consolation prize?) But the winner IS....

Yes.

Mr. Jack Olson wins!!!

Take You Where It Will...

2010-01-08T21:21:00.006-06:00

12"x12"
acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas
$185.00 (shipping included in U.S.)

to purchase please email me at climenhaga@gmail.com

...and you could win this handsome calendar!

2010-01-02T21:23:00.006-06:00

I am working on cleaning up this blog and making my usual New Year's resolution to post more here, or be more "interesting" or something or another. I go in spurts, as anyone who has known me via the internet for very long can testify too. I love blogs and all the formats out there, and it is easy to want to create one on every possible venue. So, for now I am going to make myself concentrate on this one more fully. (though I can say right now that that pretty little posterous site is always trying to lure me...)

To get me started, I thought I would have me a little contest. You know, one of those things where you leave a comment and the blog owner either writes out the names of all the entries and puts them in a hat and draws one out, or gets one of those random number generator's or something. Considering I'm lucky I've gotten this far with the internet, I will be opting for the writing the names down and putting them in a hat. ;) As it happens, I have found myself with one extra calendar of my calendar's I put together recently and sold. They have been printed by CafePress and are a nice heavyweight card stock type paper with a smooth, somewhat glossy finish. If you would like to see more info about one please check them out in my CP store. So my little give away is one calendar, sent to you, free of charge. Easy peasy! All you have to do is leave a comment here on this post, and make sure you leave me some way to trace back to you ifn's you should win the calendar, so I can send it to you! This is even open to anyone who might be reading this from another country. Obviously, you are going to be missing out on a few days of January...but there will be plenty of time to enjoy this calendar through out the year, if you are the lucky winner. :) I will be taking comments for entry up until midnight central standard time Friday, January 8th....and will draw the winner on Saturday, January 9th.

Okay, so ready, set, go! :)

Two...

2009-12-07T14:25:00.009-06:00

Vanishing Point
6"x8"
acrylic on cradleboard

Recital
5 3/4"x10"
acrylic on scrap of plywood

each are 50.00 ...
write me, or go here...

Some drawings I've been doing lately....

2009-12-07T12:02:00.003-06:00

...and so it goes again...

2009-12-04T22:53:00.002-06:00

I always feel a little slow on the uptake, so in case someone is reading this that would benefit to hear a fairly simple breakdown of Etsy vs. 1000 Markets...read on. And here's the thing, as with anything, there are pros and cons to either.

~Etsy costs .20 a listing. (and if you are into that renewing thing, you pay it again and again and again....)
~They accept International payments.
~They use PayPal. (or you can accept a check or money order if you prefer, or rig it to accept other things. But basically put...they like PayPal.)
~They take a 3.5% transaction fee.
~PayPal takes a 2.9% plus .30 per transaction. (unless you sell high volume)

so that's a total of 6.4% plus .50 per transaction.

BUT, you get your money right away.

~1000 Markets costs nothing to list.
~They ONLY use AmazonPayments.
~They only accept domestic orders/payments. (currently)
~They take 5.5% plus .50 per item once sold.

BUT, you have to wait awhile to get your money through Amazon Payments. They work just like PayPal other than you can't withdraw funds until after a certain grace period, unless you have sold over 100 items.

Of course, there is always just your own website, or blog, or whatever....that would be free to list, and if you accepted PayPal, you would only pay 2.9% plus .30 per sale.

I don't really find the price difference to be too consequential between the two. (Etsy vs 1kM) I think the way 1kM looks is nicer, cleaner, easier to navigate. I don't like that I a have to sit around and wait for Amazon to pay me my money. Etsy has more brand recognition. Thing is...

I'm just an artist. Well, maybe not just an artist.... but I'm not a jewelry maker, or crafts person...at least not yet. Given that, and the fact that I mainly have transfered to wanting to use these sites for the purpose of selling prints and showing my art... well I guess I'd have to go with....

Yeah, that's right. You decide. ;)

P.S. I think I might have just written this post to remind myself of the fees instead of having to go hunt for them the next time I forget. ;)

My Own Personal Starving Artist Sale!!!

2009-11-24T09:59:00.011-06:00

No need to go to some hotel chain in the big city to get yourself and original from a "starving artist". You have landed in the right place, right here. ;) I am offering up for sale some of my older pieces that are on paper. The mediums vary, but they all have the same thing in common...they are unframed works on paper. All are 5o.00 or under....most are under! Prices don't include shipping, but don't worry....it's not all that expensive and we can figure it out together! Be sure to click on a photo to see the art a little more up close and personal...

1.
City
$30.00 USD
watercolor
17 1/4" x 13 1/4"
This one is an odd size from a piece of watercolor paper I must have cut myself...but not to worry! It is also the only piece offered here that will come with a free mat! The mat is black and was cut specifically for this piece. What a deal!

2.
In Good Time
$20.00 USD
soft pastel on black paper
12"x9"
This was the first piece I did for the whole Inspire Me Thursday challenge thingamajig.

3.
untitled
$20.00 USD
Oil pastel on Bristol
9"x12"
I think I must've been thinking back on my hippie days on this one...

4.
untitled
20.00
oil pastel on black paper
9"x12"
I have scoliosis & this was just me interpreting that...

5.
untitled
$20.00 USD
soft pastel on black paper
12" x 9"
I took all of these pictures by hanging them on a clothes line, but truth be told, this one looks better when you look at this scan of it. It's been hard to photograph this one. The colors are really somewhere in between the way it looks in a photo and the way it looks in the scan.

SOLD!!!
6.
Space Walking
20.00
water soluble oil pastel & ink on bristol
14"x17"
Want to know a secret? My husband doesn't like this one...and I always have. Proof that everyone is entitled to their opinion. ;)

7.
Cloud
50.00
acrylic on gessoed watercolor paper
23"x29"
Don't let the photo fool you...this one is pretty large. It will need to be mailed rolled up in a mailing tube. The thing I like about this one is I can never decide which direction it should go. Try looking at it all four directions... it's fun!

*****
See something you would like to purchase? Leave me a comment or shoot me an email to climenhaga@gmail.com. You can pay via PayPal, or by writing a check. Please respect the fact that no art will be mailed until payment is received. Thank you for your consideration!

~Miriam

Draw 8

2009-11-23T07:47:00.003-06:00

From yesterday...(drawing # 9 will need to take place today.) I didn't have much time yesterday to draw. That's the beauty of this exercise though, some drawings will be nothing more than thoughts on scraps of paper, and some will be full blown attempts at something special. This one falls under the first category. But oh, I can see the possibilities...

http://twitter.com/climenhaga
#draw365

Draw 7

2009-11-21T22:00:00.002-06:00

Forgive me but the drawing is slightly cut off at the bottom due to my scanner being slightly smaller than the paper. You might also click on it to get a better look at it. :) Having fun playing with shape and line.

http://twitter.com/climenhaga
#draw365

Draw 6

2009-11-20T16:53:00.004-06:00

I know this is good for me...but it sure is hard. I had a teacher once who claimed the only way to becoming a great artist was to do a lot of self portraits. I did a lot of them a long time ago, but I haven't done many of them lately. Like I can't remember how long ago it really has been, lately. I noticed I became less interested the more lines I started to see on my face. Which is pretty silly because I don't really have a lot of lines yet. Knock on wood. I think it really just boils down to I find it hard to look at myself that much. Maybe there's some deep psychological reason here...not really sure...but I find it hard to look at my face with the concentration it takes to draw a picture of it. Not only are you critical of yourself because we are just all naturally vain enough to be critical of our appearance, but you become critical of your drawing or artistry. But, that said, I agree with my old teacher. I think there is something timeless, and of the soul, to be found by rendering a portrait of oneself. I can't expect this to be very good today, as I have stated before, my drawing skills are pretty rusty. But I found it fascinating that almost immediately I could remember the basic curve to take here and there. It is my face after all. And I know it better than almost any other.

http://twitter.com/climenhaga
#draw365

Draw 5

2009-11-19T11:13:00.002-06:00

http://twitter.com/climenhaga
#draw365

Draw 4

2009-11-18T10:06:00.004-06:00

convoluted clouds and flowery dreams...

http://twitter.com/climenhaga
#draw365

Draw 2 & 3

2009-11-17T15:44:00.005-06:00

Okay, last night I drew a drawing...really! I didn't wimp out on the second day. However, I did it right before I went to sleep.

And today I drew this one:

I'm not going to promise these are going to be very good at first...if ever. But I am glad I am doing it. I'm always telling myself I would improve on painting if I would draw more. I used to all the time...and am not sure why I stopped. Perhaps the lure of the paint brush became too much. I'm drawing, for now, on this watercolor paper from a moleskine that I got wet by accident and it got all warped. Makes me feel like I'm putting it to good use finally. Plus, I can add paint one of these days if I feel so inclined. :)

http://twitter.com/climenhaga
#draw365

Where Children Tread...

2009-11-16T18:46:00.008-06:00

A little book box. Collaged, painted, and polyurethaned for protection.
5"x7"x3"
Interested? Email me at miriam.climenhaga@gmail.com
32.00 USD plus shipping

Box #2

2009-11-16T12:13:00.005-06:00

measures 6"x6" w/ depth of 3.5"
interested? email me at miriam.climenhaga@gmail.com
$40.00 USD plus shipping

p.s. click on the pics for a closer view...

Draw 1

2009-11-15T22:05:00.003-06:00

I want to join in on trying to draw something every day for a year via Twitter (#draw365) ... I always have the best intentions with these type of things and never get very far. We'll see how this one goes.

It's interesting how we all make marks differently. I have always been fond of doodling, and seeing how the marks have changed over the course of time has been fascinating to me. When I put a pen to paper with no intentions, the marks often come out in the same fashion...but I see something new in them each time.

Find me on twitter @climenhaga

Miriam

"Our Town"...

2009-11-04T15:49:00.004-06:00

I bought three of these little wooden "book" boxes awhile back. They measure 5"x7" with a depth of approximately 3". This one is covered in a scrap of an old pillowcase, (that has been the object of a couple of other of my creations...) some tissue paper and acrylic paints. The inside has contains a photo copy that I made onto a piece of ancient rag type watercolor paper that belonged to my dad that I've been carrying around in my "stash" trying to figure out what to do with it. It worked perfectly for this as it's a tad aged looking to begin with. I copied my favorite passage from the play "Our Town" by Thornton Wilder and collaged it in with some polyurethane. (It's Emily's closing speech at the end of Act III). And there you have it!

If you are interested in purchasing this box, please email me at miriam.climenhaga@gmail.com
40.00 USD plus shipping.

Just another day...

2009-11-02T07:37:00.003-06:00

Because I have a six year old boy, Halloween descends upon me like a storm of lightning and fire and mayhem that I even though I see it coming, I don't see it coming. Because my little world doesn't do it like we did when we were kids, there are more than one events to choose from besides the official "real" night of trick or treating. On the 30th we went to the downtown shindig that our local town throws. Hundreds of kids parading around in thin costumes through icy temperatures up and down the main street, stepping into warm storefronts for seconds at a time and collecting candy bars. Seems like everyone is giving out the "good stuff" anymore, as opposed the select few. Butterscotch's are a thing of the past, which would disappoint my dad greatly if he were around to rifle through my son's pumpkin. (I can't even say paper bag...as that has changed too.)

The next day....or the "real" Halloween started a day long adventure. We were headed to our old town so we could attend a birthday party for my best friend's son's birthday part on November 1st. I figured we might as well go the day before and then we could trick or treat around my old neighborhood where I had spent many a Halloween walking up and down the bumpy brick sidewalks. We spent the afternoon with my friends who arranged my art show that I just did, and H. got to play with their bevy of six kids. I guess this is where the exhaustion set in. ;) We followed that up with actual trick or treating on the said 'ol stomping grounds, spent the night w/ my sister and her little daughter. We woke up to standard time and a fabulous huge breakfast and a beautiful day. I raked leaves for the sole purpose of the kids being able to jump in them and play. A perfect Fall day. That evening we went to the birthday party at the local gym/playground thing and H. jumped right in to the festivities of playing with ten little boys that he didn't really know, save one. He's not shy, my boy. Though I'm not sure what the kids thought of him. I could tell some of them warmed up to him quickly...but one or two were put off by him a bit. It made me sad to think that the way we are as humans can start that early in life. That too has changed. Or perhaps I wasn't aware of it when I was little. I remember that kids made fun of the way I laughed when I was little. And I can tell that H. has a strikingly similar laugh, and that the kids don't quite know what to make of it. Perhaps because he is a boy he is not as sensitive as I was? Only time will tell. As an adult I still, strangely wince when someone tells me how great they think my laugh is. Because for some reason, as adults, people seem to like it. Maybe because they don't hear laughter as much any more. Exhausted, we drove home, listening to the new Muse album, which H. now can sing the first couple of songs with full gusto, slightly off key in a six year old kind of way, and filling my heart with joy.

I am telling you this because the weekend was about H. The joy of getting handed more candy then a mommy would ever hand out to her kid in a full year. (my sister was completely aghast when I reported that I let H. do what I had always done when I was a kid...which was come home that first night, dump all the candy out into the middle of the floor, and eat as much if it as I wanted. Try it sometime...it's freeing.) Dressing up in silliness, whether store bought or put together by hand. The joy of seeing friends dressed up, peering at them to recognize them. Halloween is one of the main, simple joys of growing up a kid in America. It is also my favorite brother's birthday. (okay, so I only have one brother...)

But now there is an undercurrent that was not there before, when I was a footloose and fancy free kid. There is a constant running sadness the lingers in and out of my days around Halloween that will never go away. It catches me in the throat when I least expect it. And H. doesn't comprehend why my eyes will suddenly fill with tears. I am a good actress and I put on a brave front, but at some point, I take a breath and wish most heartily that my father was still alive. Sometimes it is hard to believe that he is watching over me, or around me, or in a world that I simply can't see. Sometimes I wish that he had just died on a normal day... a day that had no attachments to it already. Dia De Los Muertos was probably one of my father's favorite celebrations...he loved all things Mexican, and tequila once upon a time. So it has seemed fitting for the past nine years to note that he left this physical world on November 1st. But for some reason it always just wings by me...in the rush to make sure that Halloween is all that my little boy could want.

Perhaps today I will build a little altar. I don't have any beer in the house to leave. Besides it would have to be Milwaukee's Best anyway. Royce still smokes on occasion though...so there might be a cigarette I could find and place there. I loved my father so much. I wish everyone could have known him. I will miss him until the end of my days. And I dearly hope that I will see him again.

Calendar 2010

2009-10-31T11:52:00.004-05:00

I have put together a 2010 calendar for your personal viewing or gift giving pleasure! Like last year, I am offering to send these to you personally as opposed to through CafePress. You will save a little bit of money this way, and I will make a little more. But, it's up to you...you are more than welcome to order them through CafePress if you would rather. Please follow the links to have a look at them along with all the specifications.

http://www.cafepress.com/climenhaga.410228921
http://www.cafepress.com/climenhaga.410228919
http://www.cafepress.com/climenhaga

If you would like to order a calendar (and you can order more than one!) from me then all you have to do is email me, or send me a private message via this fan page. Here's the deal:

8.5 x 11 calendar (this is a standard calendar size)
20.00 each
3.00 shipping
2-3 calendars can be shipped in a Priority Flat Rate envelope for 4.80
Want more than three? Let me know and I'll calculate out the cost for you.

11x17 calendar
23.00 each
5.00 shipping
Want more than one? The shipping will basically go up about 1.00 per pound, and the 11x17 calendar weighs just under a pound. So add 1.00 per extra calendar. If you want an exact cost based on your zip code, don't hesitate to ask!

Insurance? Add 1.75 for one, 2.25 for 2-4, 2.75 for 4 on up....(I'll cover the rest if you get more than 2.75 worth of insurance.)

How to pay? You can mail me a check, a money order, or you can send money via paypal. To send money via paypal all you need is my email: climenhaga@gmail.com.

To send a check or money order, please contact me and I will send you the address.

I will take orders up until November 23rd (meaning I need to get a check or money in my paypal by then...) and will order them and send them out in time for Christmas!

Hope I made this easy enough to understand! And I hope you'll order a calendar! Email or message me with any questions you might have!

If you would like me to sign your calendar...let me know that too!

Edited to add: If you are outside of the U.S. just contact me and I can calculate shipping cost...

Love,
Miriam

MIA but the action never stops...

2009-10-30T09:55:00.003-05:00

I have been MIA from this blog for awhile now, haven't I? I think I just got so exhausted from thinking about art and my art show in Garden City that I needed to take a bit of a break from thinking about it all. That fine line between creating and marketing can be a drain, as I'm sure almost any artist/crafter would agree. It causes moments of great angst in me, and also euphoric highs. Just depends on the weather, I guess. The show was a great success for me... it's always a thrill to see your work on a wall in a gallery, and when it's entirely devoted to your work, well that's a wow! It was a small intimate space, beautifully lit, and there were several more people attending the reception than I thought there would be since it was a closing reception. I can't remember why now that I said it would be easier to be there for a closing one instead of an opening one, so I guess that just shows you how the days pass. (This morning my son said to me that he could hardly believe that it was just October 1st the other day and now it was the 30th...) If you ever happen to be in Garden City, Kansas you should consider going and hunting down the Mercer Gallery on the campus of the community college there and checking out whatever the show might be. David Kinder is the painting teacher and the gallery curator, and was quite an interesting artist to talk with. Brian McCallum is the ceramics teacher and director of the art program there, and more importantly an old friend, who is also equally interesting to talk to about art. Just sayin'...you might be stuck in a snow storm there as I write this. ;) Here are a couple of pictures from the show:

Sigh

2009-09-27T16:31:00.003-05:00

Ahhh, sweet bliss, the paintings are painted. They are gone and waiting for their show that I will not see until the very end of it at the end of October. Here is a link to flickr that shows all of the ones that ended up being in the show. CLICK HERE!!!

On to the next "thing".

A little longer than 140 characters....

2009-09-24T11:55:00.003-05:00

Today I am a trifle sick. Started yesterday...scratchy throat, general tiredness... I need it to go away because I am at the end of getting together my paintings for my solo show in Garden City, Kansas at the Mercer Gallery on the Garden City Community College campus. I am excited to be having a show. Who wouldn't be? Recently I have "discovered" Twitter. I'll admit I stayed away from it for a long time because well, let's see, originally my husband used to do it. Waaaay back about three or four years ago. I have to wonder if it was back when it was invented or something. I gave him a lot of trouble for it. I mean the name "twitter" and the whole "tweets" think seemed silly to me at the time. It was him and a bunch of librarians, so I wasn't really opening my eyes to the potential. And then as time went on I realized that there were just tons of people on Etsy and the like who were always raving about it too. However, this still didn't stir my interest. It just seemed like one more self promotion type thing...or the opposite like Etsy is, where for some reason you're supposed to "self promote" by doing no such thing and rather bending over backwards to promote other sellers. Perhaps this is an unpopular thing to say, but this is sometimes how I feel. (Either way, I find that self promotion when you are trying to sell something gets old. I worry that I am bothering people too much, at the same time that it is an evil necessity because if I don't do it, people will never buy anything. But, believe it or not, the whole reason I ever joined Etsy in the first place was to share my paintings more than to sell them. Don't get me wrong though...I can always use the extra money. I guess the sharing thing is exactly why I don't get into the whole "relisting" aspect of Etsy. I think it's a waste of time and energy.)
Anyway, back to Twitter...I finally succumbed. It came at a time when I was trying to promote (there's that word again) the fact that I finally started offering prints of art in my two shops. (see sidebar) However, along the way, I discovered something much different and quite pleasing. I can't quite remember where it started exactly, but I started to realize that there were all these artists on twitter that were just artists, sharing their work. Yeah, some of them sell through sites like me, and some just sell through their blogs, and some don't sell at all...at least not via anything on the internet that I can see. Some are just there sharing. Sharing ideas, and quotes, and work, and thoughts, and support about art. I love it. It's like the thing I was hoping to find on the internet about art, I finally found. If that makes any sense. I suppose I could have found it if I'd just tried a little harder... but it gave me that quick passport to it. I kind of wish I'd joined sooner.
Another thing I've discovered via twitter is this "other" place to blog. Needed that like a hole in the head. I like the way it's set up though, and I've been posting the paintings that I'm going to have in my show there. It's not quite complete as I still have some more photo's to take...but have a look if you would like a look.

http://miriamgraceclimenhaga.posterous.com/

http://twitter.com/climenhaga

Work in progress....

2009-09-18T15:51:00.002-05:00

I'm not telling which are almost done and which aren't. ;) Plus, you just never know what will happen next...

2009-09-16T17:49:00.001-05:00

I hope I die in the Fall.
Like a leaf that just turned
a brilliant red blush
as it let go
and fell a soft
fall
to Earth.

A bird happy
to land and just gaze at the sky
so far away,
with wonder
at the beauty of it all...

God her first thought,
her last resort.

~Miriam
9.15.09

And so it goes...

2009-09-09T07:28:00.002-05:00

I wake up at 5:30 a.m. now. I used to get up at "around" 8:30 or 9:00...whenever Harrison woke up really. But, he needs to be on the bus by 7:15, so now I wake up at 5:30. I tried telling him I could take him to school. The ride wouldn't be as long...he could sleep in a whole extra hour, if not an hour and a half... he doesn't want to because he really wanted to ride a school bus. He has friends on there already that are a year or two older, or in a different kindergarten class, so this is his only time to see them. He's starting early on that "old guy sitting around the coffee shop at the crack of dawn shooting the sh*t" thing.
So I wake up at 5:30. Originally it was to get him up... let him watch "BAKUGAN" and that's the only time of the day it's on. (Don't ask...) But he now favors "Ben 10" which is after Bakugan. But now I'm used to getting up at 5:30. So I get up and make coffee...and it's dark outside. The cat is up, the dog wants outside. All mundane tasks that millions of people go through every day but for me is brand new, because it's been probably since I was 17 that I have gotten up this early. Why is it so easy to settle into a new habit, but so hard to break the old one in the first place?
He gets up and watches Ben 10. And then he eats. And then he gets dressed. Somewhere in here he starts arguing with me, and the sun starts to come up. This morning it is more of a stage with the lights rising, as it's raining a fine mist and no sun is to be seen. The light just appears. Slow fade in to green trees just ready to turn to Fall. Layers of Payne's grey in strips on the horizon. He doesn't want to change his pants once I discover a huge stain right on the crotch that I missed before. Looks like soup that spilled or something. He keeps trying to run to the computer and get on it, which there is no time for. He refuses to put his own socks on today, even though he just did it yesterday. "Did you brush your teeth?" "Yes." ...I'm dubious. I go to put on some pants so I'm not wearing pj's out by the bus, though I don't know why I really care, and when I come back in he's stuffing a homemade peanut butter cookie in his mouth from the batch I made last night. "Did I say you could eat a cookie?" "I'm not eating a cookie.". "Don't lie." "I'm not lying."
And so it goes...
It's all a sudden rush to get out the door. The realization that it actually is raining. The thought that I really do need to buy an umbrella for him, and why haven't I ever in the past? I see he's gotten chocolate all over his pants that I made him change into. I remember his glasses...and dash in to get them. We walk across the expanse of yard to the road to meet the bus, arguing all the way about tiny, silly things, and wait.
The rain is fine and slow. I put the hood of the jacket he doesn't want to wear over his head to keep him dry. He wants to know where the sky goes when it gets done raining. I try to point out the grey clouds moving to the right. He suddenly steps into me and lays his head on my stomach as we are standing there, and snuggles. We aren't cold. Just close. I remind him gently that it would be nice if he told his teacher today that he was sorry for misbehaving right when he got out of school yesterday. I had gone to pick him up for the first time, and the change I guess rattled him and he acted out. But I told him that it was up to him. Sometimes we need to say we're sorry only when we mean it, and on our own terms. And that he is growing up now, every day, and it's a new world for him. He looks up at me and says "I want you to be my teacher." and then snuggles his head into me again. "(aww) I will always be your teacher...and if I'm not with you then I am your teacher right here in your heart." "And if you ever need a question answered, I will help you." Everything is soft for a moment. The rain is sweet, and the Earth is silent. The green of the fresh mown grass is striking against the barbed wire fence and the field that is allowed to grow wild right next to it. For a second I think about asking him if he wants to be homeschooled again, and then I think better of it. We just enjoy the moment huddled against each other. "I love you."...and in the tiniest voice of barely a whisper "I love you, too."....
The silence is broken by the faint motor of the bus and then it's shiny roof appears at the hill just ready to break it and roll down the road towards us. He hugs me a moment longer and then when the bus is more visible he breaks aways and goes to stand closer to the road. He gleefully jumps on and says hello to the driver. Usually he scurries into his front seat, but today he turns around and standing starts waving at me. Then he sits down and continues waving at me furiously through the window. The doors shut, the driver pulls forward. The bus lumbers on down the road towards the East...crests another hill...and is gone.
The dog runs up to me and nudges me, ready to go back inside.
And so it goes.

2009-09-04T06:45:00.003-05:00

I want my art to mean something. While it always starts from a moment of color, over time it develops into some sort of symbolic thing to me. I am not always good at articulating what that is, but I am getting better. I have tried to paint what is in front of me...and I just can't do it. Which means I don't want to. Well, let me qualify...I can, I just find it kind of boring to do. I admire realism in others work, greatly...it's just not for me. What makes us like this? Why do we see what we see? I had the realization about five minutes ago that most of my current paintings have some sort of theme about death, to them. I will have to describe why in a later post.... I'm just not prepared to do that right now.

However, on the other hand...I was just remembering my dad quoting Archibald MacLeish when I was a child: "A poem should not mean...but be."

;)

M

Testing...testing...

2009-09-03T18:28:00.002-05:00

So I changed this from http://juneblue.blogspot.com to http://miriamclimenhaga.blogspot, as I mentioned previously. But it did make it so if you put in the juneblue address it says that it doesn't exist, instead of just going to the miriamclimenhaga blah blah blah. I guess I should have known this...
So for now I am just posting something to post. Because I have nothing to say. Or everything. I have a lot going on that I would like to share. Both about art and about just living and my little boy going to kindergarten.
I will have to measure how to go about talking about what, when. I'm kind of the type of person that easily switches subjects while talking. I've been accused, more than once, of taking the long way around the story. This would be something I inherited from my father I suppose. ;)
For now...I've got my draft coming up for my fantasy football...yes, my fantasy football...and I am watching my son pretend play "Dude What Would Happen!". Have you watched "Dude What Would Happen"? Let me show you....

What's in a name?

2009-09-02T07:32:00.003-05:00

In my never ending quest to switch my online presence from being named "juneblue" to being called by my real name...I have changed the blog name of this blog from juneblue to miriamclimenhaga.blogspot.com. I'm not really sure how that affects things on this blog...like followers and what not. But here's hoping it's a smooth transition. As with all things, it will all work out eventually.

When I was a teenager we had a dog (a boxer) named Ms. She would bark at pretty much nothing, all.the.time. If she thought she heard the wind outside the door, she had a bark for that. My dad would often go to the door and open it and say "Why it's June Blue from Kalamazoo!" Meaning there was no one there, of course...and imaginary figure. I thought it had a nice ring to it back when I was trying to be "anonymous" online. Then I started to think more along the lines of "what's the point?". I suppose this realization came as I started talking more and more about my art, and posting it, and trying to sell it.... There seemed to be a confusion there about my name being June or being Miriam. I have always loved my name as well. In part because of who I was named afte r, and in part because of my deep appreciation for my the family that I came from. It was for this reason that when I got married I chose to keep my maiden name, regardless of the fact that my married name would be a heck of a lot easier to spell and deal with. So to be going around online by a name that I just thought was a cute sort of anonymous name seems silly to me now. I am proud of my life as it has become. I am proud to be an artist. I need to honor who I am by just being that...which means going by my name. Some of you know I've debated this for awhile. I think I've told that story about June Blue a few times... so here's to June Blue from Kalamazoo! And here's to Miriam Climenhaga from Kansas!

(change your settings accordingly! ;) )

~M

The title of this painting remains to be seen...

2009-08-27T20:45:00.005-05:00

I'm not sure why, but I was stuck on keeping this painting blue. There's a little green in it on the bottom...but not much, and I'm not sure how well you can see that from a photo. It's a mixed media piece...there are/were some scraps of paper from an old dictionary in there. It all started from the part at the beginning that was describing some grammatical thing...and I felt like it read like a poem...

pssst...if you click on the photo you can probably read what it says....

The great experiment begins....

2009-08-25T21:19:00.004-05:00

edited to add: I really want to get this "buy now" button right, and I don't seem to be able to determine if it will let you buy anything w/ the button if you are outside of the United States. Naturally, I don't want to sell something and then have the shipping be more than I calculated. Not that I'm going to get a run on people purchasing through the U.K. or something...but you never know, and it's important to remember that Canada is not part of the U.S.. (Lucky them...) Soooo....I am suspending that darned "Buy Now" button until I can get it figured out. However....rest assured...if you ever see something that you would like to buy that I post here, just give me a holler. (That means you do not have to purchase this from my Etsy shop if you don't want to...) In the meantime, I am going to show you how I listed this in my Etsy shop for the time being...

This was to be a page in a children's book that I never got around to writing. I still love the image though...who knows, maybe someday I will write it. ;)

The original is done in gouache and pastels on watercolor paper. It is not for sale. (Like I said...maybe I'll still write that book!)

This is a limited edition printing of this piece on 11"x14" Epson Premiere Matte paper using Epson Ultrachrome 9800 K3 inks. The archival guarantee is 85 to 100 years. The image size itself measures 8 3/4"x12". The third photo is intended to give you more of an idea of the amount of white border surrounding the image, and supposing a three inch mat or frame. The black will not appear on the print ordered.

I will only have 20 of this size printed. This is 1/20 and will be signed by me on the lower right, front corner and numbered, in pencil. If you would prefer to have it signed on the back, please leave a message for me when checking out in the "message to seller" box.

SHIPPING: I find it almost impossible to estimate International shipping costs. I would be delighted to send any art Internationally. However, at this time I must ask that any International customer contact me first so that I can develop an accurate shipping cost for you. Customs and duties will be the sole responsibility of the purchaser.

I prefer to ship all prints Priority w/ insurance.

All work is copyrighted by Miriam G. Climenhaga 2009

Thank you, Mr. Winkler.

2009-07-29T17:28:00.002-05:00

Today I was playing with art. Since I'm an artist by trade, it might seem odd to say I was playing with art....but all you creative types must know what I mean. Sometimes you get so involved in trying to make everything perfect, that you don't allow yourself to play at all. I see on blogs definitely two types of artists...one is the type that takes themselves way too seriously, and the other is the type that does nothing but play. For me, I have to find some sort of balance in between those two. Of course, this is somewhat of an exaggeration...but it does, somedays, seem to be that way. Since I've been working on pieces for my solo show coming up in October (at Garden City Community College in Garden City, Ks. if any of you happen to be in the area...) ;) I have been stressing and doing the way too serious thing. So today (well it kinda started last night) I "forced" myself to quit thinking so much, and just do. For some reason I always seem to get to this happy place when I play with tissue paper. I think I've been fascinated w/ tissue paper since I was a young girl and my sister brought home some tissue paper flowers that her class had made in school. I have still never learned how to make those things, and every now and then run across them and I still want to know how to make them! Anyway, I had played with some watercolor last night...something else I don't do much of anymore is watercolor...and today went back to it and started messing with some tissue paper. When I'm done with it, I'll post it here...it's drying right now though. So while I was playing with bright colored tissue paper and watercolors I had this realization. I realized that Mr. Winkler, my fifth grade teacher, is really the person responsible for my becoming an artist. Not only was he the kind of teacher who told you constantly that you could grow up to be whatever you wanted to be, he was also the only teacher I ever had that actively encouraged his students to be creative. And to read. He ended up becoming the librarian at my grade school, and remained so until he retired. His class was by far the most unstructured class I ever had. It was the luck of the draw that I got into that class. He had an old upright piano in his room that we were all allowed to play on freely during free times. We had free times. Looking back I have this sinking feeling that they don't let teachers behave the way he did anymore... We had extended reading times right after lunch recess where he would read to us while we sat and drew or painted whatever we wanted. He supplied endless amounts of paper. I remember he loved "The Hobbit" so much that he read it to us three different times throughout the school year. It was terribly easy to talk him into an extra chapter each day. He was singular. While all the other teachers I had seem to sort of run into each other in my memory, in terms of the way they taught, Mr Winkler was an anomoly. Truly one of a kind. There was never a bad day in that class. He had sparkly eyes, and white blonde hair, and he showed Siamese cats on the weekend's and always provided his old trophy's to us as "rewards" for mini contests for poetry, etc. Everyone got one. Everyone felt special. I wonder if he is still alive? I'll have to find out... I truly don't think I would have become an artist without his allowing me to play with art every day. Sixth grade was fun, but it was kind of a disappointment.... Mr. Anderson taught me everything I know about division and fractions. ;)

snack time!

2009-07-28T23:30:00.003-05:00

This frog/toad has been jumping up on my living room window every night for about a week or so, and munching on bugs. I took this pic the first night I noticed him... I think it's funny he keeps coming back. Smart frog. There's plenty of bugs to be had. He just caught himself a lightning bug at this writing.

Ramble On....

2009-07-25T11:22:00.003-05:00

I have a playlist embedded in this site that I vary the songs on. Currently it is Led Zepplin's "Ramble On". I think through out my adult life I have found that song to be somewhat of a theme for me.
I spend a lot of time looking at things on the computer and not accomplishing much of anything.
My thoughts are random and disconnected.
I jump from paying attention to my child, to thinking about a project that I am not working on, to doing the dishes, to standing in the middle of the room and just staring, with the same ease until I realize that by the end of the day I have not accomplished one thing.
This is really starting to bother me.
I want every minute to count, to be full of something great.
Which reminds me...what did I hear last night at 1:00 am on the tv show on Bravo called "The Fashion Show"? (Yeah, add insomnia to the list too...) I love how you get gems off shows like that. Anyway....I think it was a woman who was the main poo~ba for Harper's Bazaar or some such magazine that said something to the effect of "good is the enemy of great". Ain't it the truth. At least I think so. I was sitting there staring at a painting that I am working on, trying to decide where exactly to put the next cloud....when this line was said. I'm not quoting it exactly, but it's the gist of it. The thought that to just accept good means you never achieve great. I know my mind works that way. Now this is not to say that every single thing I create is great....but it is to say that my brain is always working that way...hoping to achieve that....looking for the thing (like where the next cloud should go) that will make the painting great, as opposed to just good.
Which reminds me....that a friend the other day asked me where I got my ideas for paintings, and was surprised when I said from my head. She wanted a reference point, but the reference point is my head. I spend long hours gazing at landscapes outside my windows, while driving, in books. I spend my whole life looking actually, at everything. But I very rarely think to sit down and actually look at an object in order to paint it. I was surprised that she was surprised. Which is a good thing, because it is always a good thing to be brought back to the reality that not everyone thinks the same way, or sees the same way.
We as humans, can become very self absorbed. I know I can. I don't like it really...feel I should push myself out of it when I realize I am being like that.

I think I need to allow myself the latitude that this blog of mine is a place where I can be disconnected and it doesn't matter...where I can "ramble on"....where I can allow myself to fail, or just be good, and not great. I need to find some answers to some of the questions that I seek, and it doesn't seem to be workng to keep it all inside of my head.

Now, where to put that cloud.

work in progress...

2009-07-12T11:34:00.004-05:00

I seem to be avoiding talking about this painting for some reason. When I show it to my husband and my family, I have trouble putting into words what it represents. But I tell them that it has a lot of symbolic meaning. When my five year old asks me what it is (after he has kindly said "That's a wonderful painting, Mom!) I usually tell him it's about me and my dad. I then kind of leave it at that. Of course, I don't think there's much more to say than that. I have been having some troubles with it...I saw the idea of the woman pretty clearly when I started. And the image of the face in the landscape was a happy accident that helped the whole idea take shape for me. Also, the "apple" was definitely something I wanted to put into it. Sort of referencing a painting I had done a long, long time ago for a friend. The apple represents thought...teacher....fate.... The face in the landscape represents my father. The figure represents me. Life being passed on, etc. I had a face on the figure, but the eyes were too harsh. And, as I am apt to do, I felt like more expression was achieved by no expression. Or in other words, the viewer gets to determine the mood of the face. For me I suppose it's somewhat melancholy. I meant for the landscape to be somewhat desert like, as that is where we all lived when my father passed away. Perhaps another way to explain this is that it is an interpretation of what memory looks like. I'm not sure what else I will do to it. This might be it...but I need to stare it awhile longer. There is nothing to be done (funny...that has been my working title as well "nothing to be done" after Waiting For Godot...) to the actual objects in the painting. It is a matter of deciding if the coloring needs to be different on the figure, how much I want to mess with it. The figure for a long time was blue, and the whole thing was too dark. So I painted it over with white....and then it was too stark, and too "patriotic" in coloring. Last night I added yellow ochre (my father's favorite paint color, btw) and some cadmium orange. Today I will have to ponder it awhile. It's funny how some painting's can really take over your thoughts, and others are just happy relaxing moments.

Gus

2009-07-09T09:12:00.002-05:00

Someday's there is nothing that gives me greater happiness than seeing my dog, Gus, running across the huge expanse of yard we are currently living with, towards me. A horse's gallop, tongue hanging out. Fresh from exploring the woods.
I love where we live for now. Since we moved last year, unsure of how long we would stay since every new move brings unknown possibilities, or where we would want to live if we ended up staying "forever", we decided to rent. Now I'm thinking renting is the way to go and am not sure I ever want to own a house again. Well, maybe that's not true. It would be fun to own this house we are in... It's just that this house is beyond our means if we were to buy it, but not beyond our means to rent it. How does that work anyway? Oh yeah, something to do with the almighty credit score. Anyway, in addition to all of that, we still own our old house anyway, and my sister is graciously renting it at the moment. So. For now. We are renting this lovely house out in the country, on five acres, and the dog is in heaven and thinks we have done all of this just for him.

And someday's there is nothing that gives me greater happiness than seeing my dog, Gus, running across the huge expanse of yard, towards me, a horse's gallop, tongue hanging out... Fresh from exploring the woods.

Freedom's just another word....

2009-07-03T10:47:00.002-05:00

Art can be such a conundrum. I find myself in front of a canvas, or a piece of paper, afraid to lay down the first mark. There is a deep seated desire inside of me to make every mark count, to not "ruin" it, to make the painting or drawing immediately spring to life with no mistakes in sight. Yet I have no specific plan as to what I want to draw or paint. Because the moment I lay down the first mark I enter into the world of "freedom". Where everything that follows is a happy accident, a seduction of color, a mesmerizing experience of "what will happen next?". And mistakes follow....marks that I didn't mean to happen...erasing or covering up...which produce new directions and thoughts and shapes of things to come. And somehow out of all of that overthinking and worrying and such, something is produced that I look at and think to myself "I like it!". And then I wonder if others will? I used to think that theatre and fine art were two whole different worlds. I don't think that so much anymore. You still have to put yourself out there in the end. Well, I suppose you don't. But I've never been much of an Emily Dickinson type. I never understood how she could put to paper such beautiful thoughts, but never share them with a soul. The whole process of creating art....whatever that art may be...is such a painful one. At the same time that it feels like such a release to put it out there and make it part of the world.

The Tree of Life...

2009-07-01T19:48:00.004-05:00

Edited to add: A different slightly better picture. I really need a tripod...

Here is a not so great photo of my newest painting...but I wanted to share. :)

2009-06-18T18:53:00.006-05:00

The garden is this huge strip that we have no idea what we are doing with... But it's fun! We are growing tomatoes, basil, peppers, onion, collard greens, lettuce, carrots, beets, cucumber, eggplant, squash, watermelon....am I forgetting something? Wish us luck. Oh and we planted late.

The first tomato...

There's a dinosaur behind those onions...

lettuce.

I used to think I wanted to make a children's book. Harder than I thought? I painted three "pages" and part of a fourth, but never returned. This was back in1995, I believe. Her name is Minerva, and I always thought she resembled too much of Peppermint Patty.

A work in progress....
(that's not a real tattoo folks, just in case there was any doubt.)

it had to be done...

2009-06-16T17:04:00.003-05:00

I listed this in my Etsy shop today. I've been meaning to for awhile...I was kind of slow about it. I could frame it since I have a nice frame that could be used for it, but procrastinate back and forth about whether or not to try and sell it framed or unframed, online. Went with unframed...can always change my mind later?

wondering...

2009-06-12T17:59:00.003-05:00

Okay, so I'm the artist, right? I can do anything I want to, to my painting, right? So if I want to take a painting that is about a year old, and add to it...because I keep looking at it and thinking "well I shoulda done this!"...I can do that, right?

2009-06-11T20:31:00.004-05:00

Yart Sale on Etsy!

2009-06-10T08:49:00.004-05:00

Today through the 14th, Etsy is having its second annual "Yart Sale". It's just like a yard sale, only since it's on Etsy it's called a "yart" sale. :) Lots of shops are participating (including mine!). Go to Etsy and put in the tag "yart" into the search and you will see a myriad of handmade and original art appear with special deals. Here's a few of my favorites that I saw...

Doggone!

2009-06-09T13:21:00.003-05:00

So I tried something new the last few days. My friend Mike has opened up a new pet supply store in Lawrence, KS. and he hired me to paint his windows for him. This was a first time enterprise for me. I learned a lot, and feel confident that I could do it again, and even better. I'm pretty happy with my first time effort....I might try to parlay this into a bit of a part time job. Unfortunately, vinyl is really "in" right now, and not many people want to mess with the hand painted look. I am extremely grateful to Mike for wanting me to do this for him! Thanks Mike!

Rose

2009-06-06T09:21:00.003-05:00

One of the things that happens to me a lot is that I get ahead of myself. I get a thought and I go with it and then it brings on all these other thoughts, and before I know it I have lost sight of the original thought. This happened to me yesterday as I went looking for a piece of art that I own that was made by an artist by the name of Rose Johnson. Sadly, Rose died a few days ago, and very tragically. (Here is a link...) I didn't know Rose very well. She was someone who moved to Bisbee, Arizona, where I used to live with my husband (and where we were married) towards the end of our living there. I would see her every now and then...just like everyone, but a friendship never really came to be. Just ran in different circles I guess. I lived in Bisbee for three years, and one of the things I think is so interesting about my time there is that I rarely painted. I set up a room as a studio like I always do, but I barely glanced at it. And Bisbee is a happening arts place, too. Maybe I was intimidated by it? I don't know. I did do a lot of Theatre there. I also taught Theatre at the local community college with my dad. And I do know that for some reason, in my life, Theatre and Art just don't seem to mix. I can't ever seem to manage to do both at the same time.

When we got married we had this awesome wedding. It was completely on a shoestring and the reception was in the hallway of the old grade school that was now used for artist studios. For all I know, Rose had a studio there. I'm not really sure. She was the girlfriend of this guy we knew...and now it escapes my memory as to why we knew him. I guess, he too, was just another local that everyone got to know there. My husband managed a coffee shop there for quite awhile...a lot of people come and go in coffee shops. I don't remember Rose being there at the wedding, but she could have been. She was always just this really kind person that was somehow in the background of my life. And she was a wonderful artist. Only, I don't think I realized that until she gave us this small little piece that was matted. And that is what I was looking for yesterday. It's about 5"x7", and every time I run across it tucked safely into one of my many boxes of things I want to keep, I think I need to frame it. I'm sure that's the last thought I had about it. And I'm sure it's somewhere or another around here. But my going to look for something like that in one of my boxes....well....

It took me down a different road. I realized that my entire life is boxed up in about two or three boxes. Makes me think of that line from that Sugarland song. (And Sugarland is probably the only country band I've ever actually listened to, btw) "Pictures, dishes and socks It's our whole life down to one box."
In the boxes were letters that my pen pal from being a little girl were still tied up with string. I'm always wondering what happened to that girl. And letters and cards, and clippings of shows, and stuff that was supposed to go into scrap books I suppose. A lot of it isn't necessary to keep anymore...but with each looking into that box, new things go, and old things stay. I found a drawing that I did just a few years ago. I would have sworn that I sold that drawing. And I "remember" who I sold it to. I've used it often as a profile pic on blogs and such, and have lamented the fact that I sold it without getting a good picture of it. And there it was, tucked inside of an envelope with and xray of my hand from when I broke my hand. I guess it's good proof that I am getting older and with age comes memory loss. Selective and otherwise. I was happy for the finds. It gave me answers to ideas for paintings that I've had, and new ideas as well...all those little pieces of paper with old poems, and scribbles have their place in my now, if I let them. I also found several pieces of art that were given to me by another artist, who is also now dead. A girl I barely knew (but I knew her husband) and for some reason sent me many letters that had photo copied pieces of art work she had done in them. She was an amazing artist, and a troubled soul who committed suicide. I never knew then why she singled me out to send stuff to, and I still wonder. She wrote me completely out of the blue and introduced herself via a letter. Perhaps there is something in this that I am missing? Perhaps fellow artists recognize each other better than others, or want to make that connection? I know I feel that now but am not sure how to connect to some people. You feel a kinship, but are shy to say so. If I put myself back in the time period of when Laura and Rose would have given me their art work, I can safely say that not only was I in a fog in general, but I was definitely not "mature" enough to recognize the hand reaching out.

I didn't find the painting that Rose gave us for our wedding. I suppose it will require and even deeper search, and I thought I had hit everything pretty hard. But I know I still have it. I can see it in my minds eye. It was of a woman....I'll post it here when I can find it. In the mean time, I want to thank her. With everything there is that "chain reaction"...and with looking for her artwork, I discovered something new and more about myself. Even though I knew in the back of my mind it was all hidden in those boxes...well, you just have to open up sometimes and look in...you know?

She was such a lovely woman...an incredible artist. One of those people that you can visualize walking around...rather ethereal.

Please take a moment to look at her art. I think that is what any artist would want, isn't it?

Belleza Gallery
JaneHamiltonFineArt
Remembering Rose

2009-06-05T15:09:00.003-05:00

In my effort to clean up and clear out, I am taking that idea to my Etsy shop as well. I have a post up my sleeve about my current ideas and thoughts about Etsy, and 1000 markets, but before I get to that I would like to make an attempt to clear out some of my smaller and older stuff I currently have listed with Etsy. So...without any further ado...I have already marked down everything in my shop 50% off. This is a good time to buy a few one of a kind cards and such...I also have a couple of prints, some ACEO's and few original, unframed pieces. Take a look! You never know!

working, working, working....

2009-06-03T12:10:00.005-05:00

Since my son is currently attending a "kindergarten academy" to prepare him for kindergarten, (I could digress here about how odd I think this even exists...but I'll just leave it at that.) I am getting a taste of what life will be like starting in the Fall, full time. Yesterday I completely cleaned and rearranged the basement, and this morning at the unheard of hour (for me) of 7:30 am, I finished up cleaning up my studio. After painting this morning for awhile, I moved into actually fooling around with this blog a bit. I would like to get back into blogging for many reasons, but have been a little slow on the uptake. I think in three days time (that's how many days H. has gone to school) I have figured out that "energy" and "work ethic" and "desire" all seem to have something to do with my getting my butt out of bed at an early hour. Who would have thunk it? Not me, apparently.

The whole "social networking" thing can be a bit irritating occasionally... I mean, it seems like it takes more time to do things like blogging, and Facebook, and updating shops, etc. than it takes to actually paint or create something. I'm sure anyone who is reading this that is also an artist, can appreciate what I am saying. But regardless of how introverted I can be about my art, or what my art means to me...the actor in me always knows that we create to show to an audience. The trick is being willing to hear the bad with the good. The thing I've noticed though, is that blogging can also help my creativity levels...like give me goals...as long as I don't let the thought that I have to participate in challenges and the like take over my thought processes. It seems to be a careful balance for me.... So that said....

I have a lot of thoughts rumbling around that I would like to share about art...and get opinions on...but for now, with my blog, I would like to have a sort of "do over". I suppose to really start a clean slate I should consider deleting all old posts...but then I wouldn't have them to look back on, and I do believe that blogging ultimately is just another fancy word for journaling. It's always good to go back and revisit things occasionally, after all.

But in the interest of "starting at the beginning" with this blog, which I primarily consider a place to share my art and my feelings about it, as well as other people's art....I will share pictures of my newly cleaned and set up studio space! I had to move it from where it was because I found I abosolutely had to have windows. I can't believe I actually tried to set up a studio space without windows the last time I went through this....

View from the doorway...

would you believe it's clean? It really is!!!

I just put the goofy record player on here...it might not stay...but I have plenty of albums to play!

I really do know exactly where everything is! This is a cabinet that I remember being in my nursery when I was a baby...very sentimental am I. Inspiration on the walls...and a couple of paintings I'm working on.

My son painted this. It is, of course, my favorite!

in a week....

2009-05-07T12:26:00.003-05:00

A lot can happen in a week. I went to NYC last week for 7 days, and took a train. The train takes you to land you haven't seen, slows you down, lets you think. I arrived in happiness. I had forgotten to bring my charger for my phone though, so I was "cut off" for a day until I could buy another...yay! Add it to my collection. But as soon as I was able to charge it up, I realized I had three frantic messages from my best friend back home. Her brother had unexpectedly died. He was only 37, leaving a wife and a new baby behind. I felt terrible....this is a friend I had always promised to be there for if anything like this (like death...as it happens to us all) should happen to her. But I was helpless and really unable to arrive. Of course she understood, but it hurt me none the less. And so the week progressed.
First a long conversation with a friend about how we are all connected. Then I went to see the play "Exit the King" by Eugene Ionesco. It starred Geoffrey Rush and Susan Sarandon. Well, to me it starred Geoffrey Rush. What an incredible actor because at no time did you really think about the fact that it was Geoffrey Rush. Anyway, the play, as you are most likely unfamiliar with it (I know, there's a few...) is entirely about a mythical king, dying. It's an absurdest play (my favorite kind). I suppose I would venture to say that the general "theme" was to not worry too much about dying, because it is inevitable. Something we all know deep down, but few of us wish to concentrate on, or think about for more than a nano second. It is, indeed better, to enjoy life while you can. (At this point I would highly recommend that you go back to the top and read the quote in the header of this blog). And so the week progressed. I saw my aunt I had not seen since I was twelve. I hung out extensively with my best friend from college (it was she who had brought me there) and we talked and laughed, and ate, ate, ate.... I connected with many friends from college...as they seem to have all moved to NYC. I listened. The world never stopped, and exhausted I got back on the train to come back home. I had long conversations with three people I had never met. It is amazing how on the train one doesn't necessarily have conversation that are the mere pleasantries of how we talk in day to day life with strangers. Suddenly the door swings open to have that serious conversation that you are always hoping to have. Suddenly you learn life stories of people that you will never see again...and that's okay. I have a feeling that most go through these exchanges without ever learning names. But I don't believe in such things. Calista was the first person I met, on the way there....there was another girl from Oklahoma, who was studying to be a doctor, but perhaps I neglected to ask her name. On the way back it was Angel, Irma, and Jean.... I wish I could fully explain these conversations I had with them, but it would be impossible. I can only say that they reaffirmed my belief that everything happens for a reason.

And eventually and finally I was back at home with my son greeting me at the station with my husband. My son cried because he was so happy I was back, and that was a great thing. So the bustle is gone, and I'm just sitting here writing this. The cool breeze is back on a sunny day. I live in the country, far away from tall buildings and millions of people. The cows are grazing on the neighboring farm. And my friend...her brother is now gone, and he was not before I left. I have known both of them since I was teenager. He died in his sleep. I hope he was dreaming of something that made him happy.

Favorites

2009-04-24T09:18:00.004-05:00

When I use the favorites tool on Etsy, I'm pretty random about it. I use that tool to bookmark items that I want to put in treasuries most of the time. And then I favorite things I really like, or wish I could have. Of course there's also favorite sellers...those usually remain pretty intact. Because I favorite a lot of things that I'm using to put in a treasury...I have the habit of "unfavoriting" things quite a bit too, just to clean up my favorites. Also, I will go through and delete expired and sold favorites. So if I've ever "unfavorited" and item of yours, please don't be offended. I still love it. I just need to organize my brain! ;) Now that I've found the "poster sketch" tool though, perhaps I can quit favoriting things to put in treasuries.... I suppose this all a lot of gobbledy gook for someone who isn't into selling things on Etsy. So let me show by example...
Click on the links...or look at my first page of favorite items below! :)

Random Blah Blah Blah....

2009-04-21T15:33:00.003-05:00

Well I have taken the baby step towards trying to start "blogging" again. The first step is to commit to only blogging here. I can't really handle more than one blog, and I don't really want to keep copying the same post to all and so on and so forth. So since I like the look and feel of blogspot I'll just go with this. What this means for this blog is that it might not be all about my art, as originally intended. However, I get the feeling from a lot of what I've read about this oh so fascinating subject, that people find blogs that are only about a persons art to be somewhat boring anyway. Believe me, I think my life is probably way more boring...but you never know. Another thing I want to do "new" is to point out, and feature other artist's that I am seeing around too. That seems like a good way to jump off from being a blog that's "only about me". However, on the opposite side of the stream...I don't really understand blogs that are only that. I mean, at some point you need to share something about yourself? Right? There must be a happy medium. One thing I'd like to share with you right now, about myself, and perhaps get your opinion on if you are reading this...is my name "juneblue" that I came up with awhile back. I came up with that name originally so as to not be using my real name on my blog. This makes me laugh somewhat now. And then it parlayed into being my shop name over on etsy. And then the longer I've been on etsy, the more feedback I've achieved....so I'm somewhat reluctant to chuck the whole name....but I am tired of it. Even though etsy is the cause of why I am tired of it, I am still reluctant to chuck it. I don't even make sense to myself. The reason I don't like it is because, well, it's not my name. It's an inside joke that is only funny to me as to why I selected "juneblue" in the first place, and it has a nice ring to it....but I am bugged by how many people on etsy (and other places) actually seem to think my name is June. (Not that there is anything wrong with the name June) It's not! It's Miriam. I guess I naively thought that people would still take the time to call me by my real name. I don't think I realized how much it might end up bugging me. So do I start over on etsy? Change my shop name, and forget about the feedback? Or do I keep the etsy shop as is, and just change everything else to my real name? Or do I just leave it all and keep it the way it is right now? I have set up a shop on 100omarkets that is just my name...I could move over there all together. Boy, aren't these burning and interesting questions? lol! Oh well...it doesn't matter...welcome to the world of how I blog when the blog is just whatever, and not just about art. ;)

In other news: I'm going to NYC next week for a week! I'm scared and nervous in some ways as I have never been away from Harrison for more than one night. And then it was only an hour and a half away. I am looking forward to going to the MOMA, and seeing two Broadway shows. I'll be hanging out mostly with my best friend from college, but I'm also taking a day trip w/ my brother to visit an aunt I haven't seen since I was 12! That's a long time....should be interesting and a lot of fun!

Given my snails pace at blogging anymore at all...don't count on seeing much of me until after I get back. ;)

Happy Trails!

Miriam

I am....

2009-03-24T10:54:00.006-05:00

InspireMeThursday this week would like us to finish the prompt of "I am...". Again, I was very fortunate in that I had literally just finished this particular little ink/pen, painting/drawing. It's on a larger piece of Bristol Board though, so I had to take it to my local library to scan it. (Did you know you could do that? And at 600 dpi to boot!) I started this piece a couple of weeks ago in an effort to depict some frustration I feel about how I see a lot of stuff out there on, er, that site I sell art on, that looks the same to me. Now I don't expect anyone to get this necessarily, but sometimes it's fun to indulge oneself in ones thoughts...you know what I mean? I know that this is simply a painting of a flower and a big blue sky. But the name that keeps swirling around in my head is "the artist struggles to find an identity". I guess this is a little bit tongue in cheek for me, and a little bit serious. The flower is supposed to represent me. And, it's supposed to be drawn in that simple style that is so predominately prominent right now on that, er, site I sell art on. I then wanted the background to be more of a reflection of what I like to do with art...the freedom of the splashing of the ink. The "watercolor" effect. I also wanted the flower to appear lost in a big vast sea of sky. I sometimes feel quite lost in the big vast sea of art that is out there....but yet I still seem to have the crazies to keep at it. This is where I know that it is a true passion for me. I really haven't found anything else that I have ever wanted to pursue so consistently, regardless of rejection, or applause. I definitely thought about that one fallen petal too.... I'm pretty good at laughing at myself...I bet some of you never thought about how much thought could be put into such a simple design? ;) But perhaps you have...perhaps this same thought is also given to that stuff I see that all looks alike to me. I know it is impossible to make each piece of art look completely different than another. We take in what we see and it registers in our brain and we feel about it, and then it comes out in different forms....poetry, theatre, art.... Who is to say what is right and what is wrong? Art making can be a difficult subject. I think about it close to all of the time, in some way, shape or form. The answer to the question "I am..." will most likely always be "...an artist".

Check out InspireMeThursday!

Swirls...

2009-03-19T13:56:00.007-05:00

It's been awhile since I've participated in the Inspire Me Thursday challenge. Heck, it's been awhile since I've participated in much of anything really. I have been in a funk, for sure. I've written about some of it already here I guess. But mainly my brain is just feeling scattered and I haven't fully committed to participating in anything. I want to change that....but I feel like I need to turn my body into a blackberry or something. ;) I'll find a "center" one of these days. In the meantime, my kanoodling and doodling and painting usually takes the form of swirls when I feel this way. I both love drawing them over and over, at the same time that they are reflection of my confusion. I wonder how that can be? I drew this recently:

The big bad sun flower is reaching out to the little bitty daisy, I suppose. I like the whimsy of this. It's a colored pencil drawing on a 5"x5" piece of bristol board. Why is it called bristol board? It's paper, damn it! :)

I also finished "decorating" a small moleskine notebook. You know, the kind that have the kraft paper type covers? This is the front cover:

So when I read that the IMT prompt was swirls...I thought well HEY! That's my normal activity!
Here's an older piece that I've not shared...I'd say it's a couple of months old...a self portrait as it were:

I have scoliosis and I suppose this is my interpretation of that.

So I seem to recall I am not "supposed" to post something that isn't created specifically for the challenge...so my apologies for that if it is true. (But the moleskine is truly the last thing I've done!) I just wanted to get my feet wet again, and as I said before....swirls are such a part of my art that I couldn't resist...

check out InspireMeThursday!

Wildflowers

2009-03-16T14:58:00.002-05:00

This is my latest piece that I have finished...

"Wildflowers"
tissue paper collage on gallery wrapped canvas
6"x6"

available in my shop.

If you are on Facebook, would you consider adding my public "fan" page to your collection?

http://tinyurl.com/miriamart

Her Head Never Left....

2009-03-05T23:28:00.003-06:00

9"x12"
bristol board
pen and ink with a splash of acrylic

available here...

In the blink of an eye....

2009-03-02T11:00:00.003-06:00

Time passes.
When people ask I usually say I'm a self taught artist. This is mainly because I don't have a degree in Art from any college. My degree is in Theatre. When I say that I usually have this little niggling feeling in the back of my head that remembers two people.

One doesn't really count, in my opinion. My drawing teacher for drawing one back at KState when I didn't really think too much about anything at all. I remember him well though, because that class was at 8:00am which I found entirely too early to be drawing when I was 19 years old. I skipped a lot. We learned a few techniques that I thought were intriguing. I barely scooted through that class, though I did end up with a B, I think...which was due to talent I guess. Because it had absolutely nothing to do with interest or discipline, or caring, on my part. It makes me ashamed to think of. The final project was to pick any technique we had learned in class and make a final project. I picked that thing where you plot out a graph of a photo and then plot out a graph on paper and replicate it. I did a giant portrait of my brother in a play when he was a kid that I loved. I put it off until the night before and stayed up, literally, all night doing it....came late to class....didn't put it up for critique because I was embarrassed to put it up late...and showed it the professor at the end of class. He looked at it and said "You are hard to understand, because you have immense talent but you just don't give a fuck." That's a quote. :) I remember I was startled that he used the word "fuck". I guess he made his point at the time though, because it made a huge impression on me. And when I picked up the drawing after classes were over, I found a small coffee stain on the back of it. Karma, I guess? It was the first drawing or piece of art I ever spent the money to have framed, and it still hangs in my mom's hallway. A reminder. Maybe he does count, after all.

The second was my teacher at Tarkio College where I got my Theatre degree from. Mary Beth Fogarty. Over the years I go in and out of being able to remember her name, but then I go look at the book I "swiped" from her. Actually, she lent it to me, but asked that I be sure to return it. You know how that goes. Being who I am though I always remember that I should have returned it. She lent me a few books...a couple on design and basic principles of art, and one on Oskar Kokoschka. She used to tell me that my style reminded her of him and I simply didn't see it. I took a long time to get that Theatre degree. For one thing, I think it's important to note that I grew up in Theatre. It's what my parent's did...it's what my family on my maternal side did...it was a way of life for me and it seemed natural to get a degree in it. But I took a long time at it because life happened at 19 for me. I realized there was other stuff to do, albeit a lot of it could be considered a waste of time. I ended up at Tarkio College because my dad was teaching there and they paid for faculty kid's tuition. I was working on a BFA in Theatre, and then the road turned half way through what was my fifth year of college. (I took a couple of breaks along the road, as well). I'm not sure why it happened....a lot of times I honestly think it started because of the (ahem) "party" lifestyle I was into...but I went and spent a summer away from Tarkio instead of participating in their summer theatre program, and I came back only interested in art. I wanted to learn everything I could. Mary Beth was the new art teacher they had hired. It was a very small college, so they only needed one. I dropped from a BFA to a BA in Theatre, so that I could spend more time taking art classes. I took every single art class I could. I still had some, er, attendance problems (my grade in sculpture was a gift...) but I soaked it in. I retook drawing, I took painting, figure drawing, art history....anything that had to do with art and Mary Beth Fogarty was my teacher. She was an artist in her own right, from Nebraska...and she took us to exhibits in Omaha a couple of times. She was incredibly encouraging. She said some things to me that I didn't agree with, and thereby taught me that you don't have to agree with everything a teacher tells you and that's okay. She once told me that the color blue, used in it's entirety on a drawing or painting, was only reserved for Picasso. I thought that was a bunch of hooey. It makes me laugh to think about to this day. Mary Beth taught me that it was important to learn the rules first...and then it was okay to break them. She taught me what abstraction was, in my opinion. I wasn't always crazy about her art...but I "got it". She really helped to form my opinions about art to this day. She taught me everything I know about art history. She was passionate, and fun.
So the other day I saw that someone had described themselves (who didn't have a degree either, I guess) as having "studied under" a few people. I thought to myself "well I would have to say I studied under Mary Beth!" and then that further prompted me to go google her.... So I did and I found some of her work. It brought back a lot of memories, and it was weird to look at it from the perspective of years having gone by. My first thought was that she was the German Expressionist, and why had I not noticed this before? And then I kept looking and it popped out at me: she had died in 2002. How could this be? She was born in 1943! That makes her 59 at her death. I wasn't able to find any explanation of how she died. It just seemed to stun me, because I knew she wasn't very old. I found a lovely article/page about an exhibit they had for her after her death. You can read it here.
So that's it. We all know it to be true...and as artists we joke about it constantly. We press on with our art because we feel the need to "express" and if we are lucky, it all boils down to someone having a lovely exhibit of our work after we die. But the thing is....the work does live on. Occasionally someone will view it, and love it, and want to know who did it...and the name will be a name that they read and remember for a bit, or perhaps a lifetime. I am lucky to have had someone like that teach me about art. I have remembered her often throughout my life. As I said at the beginning of this...I have often had that niggling feeling that I needed to give some sort of credit where credit was due. I would have stayed with her longer if the college had not gone bankrupt and closed down...if I had not gotten a Theatre degree. But I am thankful for what she did teach me, and I need to remember those things more often. Rest in peace, Mary Beth Schmidt Fogarty.

the frustration of the spirit...

2009-02-26T09:01:00.002-06:00

Why do you paint? (or draw...collage....make art........) Do you do it because you have to somewhere deep inside of you? Do you do it to relax? Do you do it to figure yourself out? Or do you do it to sell it and make money?

I remember the day I sold my first painting. I knew I was about to head down a slippery slope and it made me rather sad. I was 27 and living in Vail, Colorado and I had been fortunate enough to hang some of my work in a coffee shop there called "The Daily Grind" in a group type show, for the first time. A woman who worked there wanted to buy a piece I had hung. I was all at once thrilled, and sad at the same time. I wasn't sad to see the piece go....I was sad because I knew it marked the beginning of something that I really wasn't sure I wanted to enter into. I was desperately broke, and I really needed the money. (Funny, some things never change...) But, I still had that fancy notion that I think a lot of artist's get...that my art wasn't about selling it, it was about the ART. A few months later I hung some more art up in Vail in a different coffee shop and some lady from Florida bought three pieces I had up. I guess they must've been 25.00 each because I remember making 75.00 off the lot and her telling me that I was selling my work far too cheap. It was that second sale that I realized I needed to start taking photo's of stuff.

Now I know that I've talked about this subject before...at least some of my feelings regarding selling vs. the spirit of art. So either forgive me while I battle some more stuff out of my brain, or just quit reading now. I won't be offended....

The thing is...I'm still broke. I still need to try and sell my art. I can't have it piling up at home as it is, because honestly there becomes too much of it. Because other than my son, I pretty much eat, sleep, and breathe thinking about art. I try to stop. But it doesn't work. I visualize concepts and I want to create them. I often write them down, and hopefully get to them later. So while I still on one hand, want desperately to return to that moment when I first "discovered" that I loved what my hand could produce...that it was the best poetry that I had written, or the best monologue I had given on stage...I am forever mired in the concept that I also need to record it, and put it out there for sale, and hope that someone likes it enough to buy it. Either that...I give it away. (Which mind you, is a wonderful thing to do, and I do it often!) I just believe there must be a balance out there.

So what's an artist to do that is stuck in between the proverbial rock and a hard place? The only thing I can do is to try and put thoughts of selling work out of my head while I am in the act of creating art....and to put thoughts of creating art out of my head while I am in the throes of sitting on this damned computer and finding ways to promote my art. The hard place is the promoting. The endless opinions that one seems to have to ingest in order to move forward, to say hi, to let people know that you exist. And there are some opinions out there that I would dearly love to throw an ever loving pie in the face at....but we are supposed to be "polite" and not go there.

Selling sites like Etsy and 1000markets are such wonderful tools for people like me who can not afford or simply don't have the current technical no how to create their own website. As well as even if I did create my own website, which I probably will one of these days....the traffic driven to it will still never top the traffic that can go through group selling sites such as the above mentioned. So they seem to be a somewhat necessary evil. Etsy isn't so bad, except perhaps it has become so large (and centers mostly on craft...but don't they all?) that it's kind of like shopping through the Penney's catalog when it comes down to it. It's huge. So one is still soley responsible for getting whatever it is that they are selling OUT there. That means lots of socializing on forums, or commenting on blogs, or what not. Pretty soon I am reminded of all that selling of myself I felt I had to do back when I was studying acting in theatre. It's all kind of the same thing. 1000markets is trying to launch a site that is similar to etsy in that it sells stuff too. But, they are trying so hard to be "more exclusive" and at the same compete with etsy, and not do the things that they think etsy did wrong...that I think they are backing themselves into a pretty tight corner of snootyness which is rather off putting. The "snooty" that I am referring to will not be apparent to the buyer...but will definitely affect the merchant that is trying to do all the things that he/she is supposed to once again "get noticed" around there. The thing about these two sites is it's like they are both special little clubs that they have thousands of people standing outside the door banging to get in, pleading to be "accepted" and basically being told by the people inside that they aren't good enough. This can be quite daunting to the spirit. A true lesson in forgiveness in my opinion. There simply isn't enough time in the day or hours on the "front page" to include everyone...and those that have weaker spirit's (I suppose?) or are just creating art in order to sell it, are going to eventually fall off and stop. Stop creating what they love to do in the first place. All because it's high school all over again.

This breaks my heart a bit. And first let me state that occasionally I feel I have broken through the doors, and sometimes I feel I'm still pounding. I have definitley had moments where someone that I don't even know that lives across the country from me, has made me feel like my art was bad and has made me have doubt. But I seem to have the power to shake that off fairly quickly because I truly see the beauty in all art...and am very aware that art is very subjective. You either like roses or you don't. You like daisies, or you don't. Or you like both. The same with art. You either appreciate the effort or you don't. It doesn't mean that you are going to go out and buy stuff from every person out there...one will always have their favorites. (personally, I like dahlia's) But it breaks my heart that there are people out there that will give up simply because someone told them they weren't good enough. I am not the most religious person in the world, but I truly believe that "God" gave people the want to create because "he" wanted them to be able to make the world a beautiful place.

So to the people that I sense want to "give up" because they aren't selling their work, or they can't get the people on the other side of the door to open it up...I want to tell them "don't give up". Or I want to ask them if they are selling their art because they truly love to create, or because they are trying to make some money. Because if it's the latter....then yeah, you should probably just stop. I realize I'm not including people in here who create stuff simply to sell it and who actually sell oodles of stuff. I don't really know what to say to people like that... I'm glad you're making some much needed money, but my guess is I can't see any soul in your work. Maybe that doesn't matter.... Maybe it only matters to me.

Maybe this is kind of a tirade? I don't know....but I've found recently that I feel stuck as to what to "blog" about on my "art" blog...and have decided to just write about whatever I feel like regarding art. You don't have to agree with me. Just like you don't have to like dahlia's. ;)

"In art, there are no rules" is what my husband said to me the other night....and today another friend added to that "...except those that we invent." Amen to that.

Some new stuff...finally finished...

2009-02-03T17:03:00.007-06:00

So after that last post of mine I set about the task of finishing a couple of painting's. I have this habit of gettingthisclose to finishing something and then letting it sit for month's on end while I work on other stuff. It reminds me of the story of the construction worker/house repair guy that I saw on tv once. He would start a million projects at home that he did for his job every day, but would never finish them at home. Anyway, one of these hadn't been sitting too long...but the other...

Well, let's get on to the more important topic of "what was I thinking when I painted this" shall we? Hah. Good question. But as a dear friend recently pointed me in the direction of doing, I think it would be a good exercise to try and describe.

It all started with these old magazine ads I had from the fifties or sixties of girls modeling dresses. I would think they came from an old Sears or Penney's catalog. That's what it looked like at least. My intention was to try and collage them into something or another. I liked how they looked, but my only hesitation was I didn't want it to appear like too much of a style that I've seen before. I realize it's almost impossible to do, but I really like to at least try to create stuff that is original. I don't know if my idea seems so unoriginal anymore, but at the time I couldn't quite bring myself to actually collage them, and in the moment of trying to decide, I turned them over. Over they were just newsprint, written words...but they looked more blank, and they started to give me a feeling of vastness. Falling somewhat into the void. I took a single girl and this is what I came up with (as some of you have already seen as I finished this one awhile back.)

And then I had some extra time on my hands and was in the mood to play so I made this one, with two girls....

I guess painting is always about playing, but I was a bit nervous at the time because I was short several paintings and had committed to showing some in a local coffee shop. I've found that I don't much like painting "under a deadline" and have been trying to paint furiously ever since, so that if I am lucky enough to get another show, I don't have to feel that kind of pressure. Yuck. So at the time, this really was playing because I told myself it was "just for fun" and did not have to be part of the show. So of course, it ended up in the show, and it ended up selling. So that should probably tell me something right there. PLAY! ;) What I thought was even neater about this one was that it felt so much like it was me and my best friend from grade school...walking into the unknown. And then she wrote me later that she felt strongly attached to this painting and that it reminded her of us. I was sad because I had already sold it. So now I learned another lesson? Hold on to stuff that has sentimental value? I dunno....I would more if I wasn't such a broke ass. But then that's what gets me into that conundrum about selling. And yes, you really can't create if all you think about is selling.

So back then I started a third one with three girls. Now this was really going outside of my comfort zone, because kinda like the thing about not wanting my collage idea to look too much like something that had already been done, I rarely repeat an idea. My husband is always encouraging me to try that actually. I mean, I suppose some ideas sort of naturally repeat themselves... but this whole "stencil" idea that I ended up doing with these girls, well...not only are the stencils outside my norm, but repeating the idea over and over is definitely outside of my norm. So the third one got stuck. It was soft and blue....a moon, or maybe two were rising....I was still thinking "far away" like a memory. (Well really, that theme is still predominate to me in all of these...) But then I put it up. I was tired of the girls. And I had to move. And then when I tried coming back to it, it just wasn't working. Until one day I got frustrated and I just started painting over it w/ red or something, like I was just going to ditch the whole thing....and it became fun again. It became something more akin to play. And I became more interested in it. I even liked it. I got to a point where I knew it needed some tweaking, and I put it down. Until the other day... The girls look a little like aliens to me, beamed down Star Trek style, but I basically enjoy the warmness of the painting, and the togetherness of the three. It's a sun now, instead of a moon....now I feel like the girls are in it together, and that though far away from a reality, they are safe.

And somewhere in there while I was waiting for it dry or while I was doodling around with other things...I went and did another little one with the two girls. I like playing w/ texture, and sometimes there's no big hidden meaning to what I do...I think I said it before that I feel like the way these girls look to me, it almost doesn't matter what I do to them, they kind of create the same feeling. I'll probably drop this idea for awhile...except I did find one of these girls that was actually wearing pants the other day....
Hmmmm....

The end.
:)

moment to moment

2009-01-30T21:03:00.002-06:00

I spend every day thinking about art in some way shape or form. I spend every day wondering when I will find the time to paint again. When I will make my mind stop and sit down and work at it again. Some days I stop and sit down and work. Many days I just think about it. Think, think, think. Lots of days are spent sitting in front of the computer futzing around with listing things in my etsy shop. Other days are spent trying to work up something that I like for my 1000markets shop. One day was spent cancelling my premium cafepress shop because I thought it was silly. I like the cafepress quality but I don't find the need to pay them for a shop that I rarely sold anything on. This brings me to how I can spend my days thinking about what sort of online venues I should use to try and sell thing. Whole days can be spent wondering what to do to market my work. Days and days and days and days....and then I break down. I just want to be able to sit and paint again. When I was 28 I lived in a tiny condo w/ my boyfriend and two of his friends and I would ignore them in lieu of going and hiding out in my bedroom and painting on the floor in a cramped little style. Now I have the luxury of room to paint and I don't do it. Well, I DO do it, but I don't drop everything. Yes I suppose it's true that I have a child to care for now. But I could still carve out the time. Or organize the time more appropriately. Of course, something I really should remember is that when I was 28 the internet didn't exist. Yeah, remember those days? And if you are reading this but are too young to remember such a time....yeah, it existed. I think I need to ditch the computer. But on the other hand...the computer is what has made so many people that I would otherwise never have known, know that I paint. What a conundrum. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but I'm hoping that one of these days I will get it right.

Two New ACEO's

2009-01-25T11:48:00.003-06:00

Here's a couple of new ACEO's that I have posted to my etsy shop...

excuses, excuses...

2009-01-07T08:43:00.002-06:00

I seem to like to avoid the issue right now. I sweep the floor. I do the dishes. Oh, I think I'd better do my umpteenth load of laundry. Don't I need to go to the store again? Yes, of course all of these things need to be done at some point....but do they really need to be done every day all day instead of me just sitting down and working on a drawing? Or writing down an idea for a painting? Or filling up some jars of water and dipping my brushes in? Perhaps even sitting here and writing this right now is simply another avoidance issue. And the big one for me is using my son, who is five, as an excuse. "I can't possibly spend time painting right now because then H. will want to too, or he'll interrupt right when I get going, or he'll...". Gee. What's going to be my excuse when he heads off to kindergarten next year? Oh yes, suddenly I'll think I need to go get a job working at some job that I find completely unsatisfying because now we'll need money. And then I just won't feel like it. Really, sometimes I don't know how I end up doing the stuff I do create....

Ahh, but I do. It is that "pull" that has no name. That thing that makes me realize that I should just resign myself to my fate. That intangible that makes me write "I am an artist" next to my profile picture up there, because of the realization that there is really nothing more to say than just that. I can't escape it anymore than the hero in a Thomas Hardy novel could escape being in love with the person they are in love with.

It was always there. I just didn't see it. Ironic that the word would be "see". I always thought I would have a career in theatre. I now see that the reason was my love of the visual. The way it all looked. (ooohh...I should do a painting of that...) But I didn't want to do scene design. I was an actor. Because of the way it all felt.

I see all of these ideas floating around in my head for paintings...and then I let them drift away. What is that? Why have I been lucky enough to make what I have made?

spurts...

2009-01-06T10:26:00.003-06:00

I have been a very "creative" person of late. As usual, art ebbs and flows with me...and I am currently in somewhat of a flow. I have the usual million ideas floating around in my head, and steps towards making the things I see are happening slowly. And while they get organized and started I am, what I would call, doodling. Or noodling. I've been concentrating on making Valentines at the moment....one here, one there. Digging up old ones and putting them in my etsy shop. I always seem to enjoy fooling around with hearts. ;) They are not great masterpieces, but they allow me time to think, and to organize my mind, and to play with my son. As I make them, in the month of January, I am going to go ahead and list them in my etsy shop with free shipping. If I sell a few great, if I don't....I will still have given myself the gift of creating them, and I will give them away to friends.
Perhaps today I will spend some time freshening up my art blog here, and all that jazz....perhaps I will not. We'll see.
I want to grasp on to this "spurt" I'm in, because truthfully I have been in nothing but a funk for at least four months.

Valentine on Purple
5x7 card
visit my shop for this listing

2009-01-02T23:15:00.004-06:00

"Fire in the Sky..."
9"x12"
soft pastel

Scanning a picture sometimes makes it oh so much brighter than it is in real life...I'll never understand. I find this one to be a tad dimmer when I look at it. I guess I'll have to attempt a photo of it, for "true" purposes. Drat.

some new stuff....

2008-12-20T11:26:00.002-06:00

I've been going a little crazy creating lately. A good thing, to be sure....I find that when I work I like to work on several things at once so I can keep working while other things dry and await the next layer. This means that I sometimes have several things "end" at once, that are all quite different. For example....

"wish" 4"x6" collage

"the soul selects..." ACEO

"Winter Snow" 9"x12" pastel

www.juneblue.etsy.com

Song For My Father

2008-12-07T20:20:00.003-06:00

I ended up naming this painting "Song For My Father". You might notice that on the bottom of this blog I have one of those little doo hickey playlists that I have the song "Song For My Father"
by Horace Silver cued up. I would say the inspiration for the painting is my dad, and his love of jazz...I suppose. I remember thinking going into it at one point that I was going to concentrate on choosing colors that reminded me of his paintings in some way. Though he was much more fond of yellow ochre. The title seemed fitting in two ways. One is obvious. The second is that even though I have no recollection of my dad playing this particular song, (my husband turned me on to it, actually) I very particularly picked it out to be the song that I danced with my dad with at my wedding. And we did. My husband likes the painting in particular, and asked to keep it. So we have. I actually think he liked it before he ever heard the title. Which is saying something. Perhaps it is just the time of year...but I so miss my father...

2008-12-05T19:54:00.003-06:00

This is an old painting that I did in 1995. I gave it to my brother, and he took some pictures of it one day. :)

working on it...

2008-11-17T10:59:00.010-06:00

My "creative every day" so far has consisted of me trying to clear space to be creative in, in the first place.

There's more to the room than this, but this gives you the general flavor of the clutter that is currently what I am dealing with. It always feels good to go through boxes and supplies though, and regroup, and that is what I have been doing since I took this photo.

In an effort to enjoy the beauty around me at the same time, I have been trying to remember to take photo's of things I see right outside in my yard, if they make me smile!

365days

Today I made...

2008-11-04T19:58:00.005-06:00

...a calendar.

My art every day for today would definitely have to be that I forced myself to finish my calendar that I made through cafepress. Actually, it's taken more than a day.

click on the pic for a link to the calendar

It's got all my newer stuff from the past year that I included in my show, etc. I've written here before about how much I loathe cafepress's base price which is so high as to thwart the person who did all the work (me) to make any moola on it. And we all need moola...as we all know. Well this year I noticed that you could buy in bulk from them and save some money. If I buy 15 or more I save money which means I can make more money! So if you buy this calendar from cafepress it will end up costing you about 30.00, but if you buy it from me it will cost you 23.00! I've marked up the cost w/ cafepress exactly the same as I've marked it up with me selling it. The only thing different is I think I can ship it for cheaper than they say they can ship it. So I'm going to try my hand at selling these this way....I'm taking orders for them up until November 15th to give me time to order them and then ship them out before the holiday's. I'm going to email my friends, post it here, post it there, etc. and see if I can get at least fifteen orders. You can pay me by check, money order, or paypal. If you want to buy multiple calendar's I can probably reduce the shipping cost, we'll just have to chat about it and figure it out. So if you're interested, comment here or shoot me a message! You can still buy it from cafepress if you want....but it would be cheaper through me!

Oh, and if you're wondering why I chose to go with cafepress again as opposed to local...I bought both last year and I found that the quality of the cafepress was just nicer. Heavier weight paper and a bit more glossy. Just nicer printing quality. I've also taken care to ensure that hole in the calendar doesn't mar the picture, so technically you could cut out a page and have a nice print to frame too, at the end of the year. Happy Holiday's!

shadows

2008-11-03T10:38:00.003-06:00

shadows, originally uploaded by juneblue.

I truly want to try and participate this year in "art every day month". I found it last year, I think, for the first time...and then thought I would try the whole year thing and failed miserably. Well...actually I didn't. I created a lot of art, I just never posted it. I kind of quit blogging in general. I really needed to take a step back from it and breathe, if that makes any sense. I feel ready to get back to doing stuff. We are more settled in our new home, and things seem to be looking up... I need inspiration, and connection, and being isolated out in the country it would seem that the computer is my friend. ;) And so here we go again. Before I felt the strong need to actually create something with glue and paint or what not to qualify it as "art". Today I realize that art is a much looser term than that and that I can be creative in so many more ways. And all of these ways can lead to the creation of things that include paint...and my imagination. And so it is with that thought in mind that I share this photo I took at the beginning of October. I look at it and the first thing I think is "what a great painting this would make!". It probably would...but I don't need to make the painting first for you...I can share the beauty of the photo and drive down the path that way. :)

~Miriam

2008-10-31T05:03:00.005-05:00

I recently won a cash prize for this painting! I guess she wasn't such a problem child after all. ;) (See post a few post's back...)

Arte y pico

2008-10-28T16:32:00.004-05:00

Well it's been awhile, hasn't it? It's hard to get back into the swing of blogging once you stop, I've found. The computer can take up a vast amount of time, but so can life.

The lovely Ascender Rises Above gave me an award. The award is the "Arte y pico" award. Look, it comes with this real live award I get to put on my page here!...

Isn't she pretty?
I feel especially honored because I haven't been around for so long, and it means a lot to me that someone took the time to come back here and even remember me. Of course, she is one of my facebook friends, which I seem to have gravitated to lately, so perhaps that is why she thought of me. :) Regardless, the fact that she has paid attention to my paintings and thought to include me in this round of award giving...means the world to me.

There's rules though... ;)
I must now give the award to five other artsy bloggers....and other stuff. And since I'm a little rusty on the "how to's" of blogging I'll just copy what she wrote here first:

1) Award five blogs that contribute to the blogging community through creativity, design, and interesting material, regardless of language.
2) Name each of the five blog authors and provide a link to his or her blog.
3) Award recipients must show the Arte y Pico Award image and the name of the award-giving blog author, as well as the award-giving blog author’s blog link.
4) Award recipients must provide a link to the Arte y Pico blog.
5) Award recipients must show these rules.

1) I will pick bluetreeart first... because I always thought it was so nifty that she inspires so many artist's through her "other" blog about being creative every day. Next I will go with "failed painter" though a failed painter she is not! Third you must check out djkreutzer and her beautiful view of life. Number four: Aprovechar If I remember correctly she has a few blogs....must browse around. ;) and last but not least... creatrix jane! :)

Sheesh, I can think of five more now that I'm looking around again. Perhaps I will have to do a part two. I think I've followed all the rules now. I think. I'll have to double check my work later...

:)
Peace!

Bird

2008-08-02T13:29:00.001-05:00

Bird, originally uploaded by juneblue.

Rise

2008-08-02T13:28:00.001-05:00

Rise, originally uploaded by juneblue.

inside out

2008-08-02T13:27:00.001-05:00

inside out, originally uploaded by juneblue.